Movie Review: The Vow

Context: The Vow is "inspired by true events" and founded upon the supposed to be romantic concept of a husband’s attempt to make his recently-awakened-from-a-coma wife refall in love. 

Only conveying half of that previously established back-story, the movie effectively engendered a comatose state among the audience, unintentionally the direct consequence of absolute boredom through the nearly TWO hours of film. 

The piece’s biggest flaw was the lack of an emotional climax ironically serving as the equivalent of flat-lining.

Apparent was the absence of any sort of chemistry between the two film’s stars which one could facetiously argue served to reinforce the notion of a romance forgotten. 

Despite the previously garnered critical acclaim for her role in the Notebook (considered in the canon of acceptable and tolerable cheesy romances) in which she portrays another memory-challenged character, the normally charismatic and charming Rachel McAdams failed to carry Tatum whose performance implied it was his brain cruelly victimized by a tragic accident. 

Given the slight parallels, it’s only appropriate to compare and contrast, leaving viewers to wonder how different it would have been if Gosling had been substituted.  

Conversely, their previous performance would undoubtedly cast an insurmountable shadow of unreachable expectations the weak writing and plot could not overcome. 

All I could ask for (besides a refund) is similar symptoms, desperately desiring the inability to remember watching this movie.